Recovering

Now that #21 has come and gone, and my series of ECT treatments seems to have come to an end, my focus is on recovery and well-being. Saturday, the first day after the last treatment, was terrible. I was wiped out all day, tired, headachey, joints were sore, and I just didn't feel like doing anything. The less often I have treatments, it seems, the worse they make me feel.

Sunday, Super Bowl Sunday!, was better, but still pretty sluggish. I keep comparing to the few days before the last treatment. Those days were REALLY GOOD. I felt good, lots of energy, my world made sense, and I wanted to be part of it. Saturday and Sunday didn't make that grade. Today, Monday, however, is getting back into that league. Today I went to a parent meeting relating to my daughter's swim team, volunteered on an art project at my daughter's school for a couple hours, walked around a "going out of business" mall with my wife for an hour, and have just had an overall high energy, good mood day.

Do I have some memory loss? Yep. No question...there are some holes in my memory, and it seems impossible to me that its been 7 weeks since I was last at work. There is just no way it could have been that long. There's no way there could have been 21 trips to the hospital...21 trips to the operating room...21 awakenings in the Recovery Room. There just isn't enough data in the memory bank to document 21 treatments, or the time period during which those treatments took place.

But I can tell you for certain that prior to ECT, I wasn't having ANY days of the quality of the days I have experienced over the last couple of weeks. Even my bad days now are better than my better days then. And my good times now can't even be compared. For anyone suffering from depression, really suffering, suicidal...you owe it to yourself to at least do the work to find out about ECT, ask the questions, before you throw in the towel.